The road to Foster Care

I'm not sure if I've ever mentioned it here or not, but I'll tell you all now for those who don't know that The Hubby and I have been thinking and praying about adoption for about 2 years now. We weren't sure where the path would lead or which path to take for that matter, for a long time, but we finally felt a directional shift recently and we jumped in! Here's the whole story, I'll try to keep it brief but that's never been my strong point ;-)
I'm sure you all know I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer back in August of 2009. Long story short, because of that diagnosis the Hubby and I decided to not have any more children because of the risk of recurrence that a pregnancy (and therefore estrogen surge, which would feed cancer in my body) would bring. I vividly remember one Saturday morning almost 2 years ago, we were sitting at a restaurant & I was crying like a freak. I explained to him the decision I had come to & we discussed how it broke my heart that we couldn't have any more children, but I felt like it was the right thing to do for all 3 of us. I cried all day & was mourning the loss of the family we had hoped for.
That evening, he was on the computer and told me he looked up a church we had been talking about visiting, which my sweet friend who cuts my hair invited us to, and said he wanted to visit the next morning. Little One was unsure about it because she was comfortable at the church we already attended, although she didn't have any real friends there, just kids she knew from Sunday mornings. We felt SO comfortable at the new church from the moment we walked in. Little One's teacher happened to be my friend who invited us (who Little One loves!) & a little girl from her preschool (who turned out to be the pastor's daughter) was in her class so she was instantly comfortable!
We sat in the back of the church & listened as the pastor began talking about adoption. They were having adoption sunday that day & were talking about & showing videos of Compassion International children & encouraging families to adopt a Compassion child. Near the end of the hour, the pastor started talking about other forms of adoption and how we, as Christians, are called to take care of the orphans. "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27
I sat there teary eyed the entire time, wishing I could hug all the children in the video, bring them to my house & feed and clothe them. God was so working on us as we sat there. The last part of the service they showed a video of the pastor and his wife in China, picking up their adopted daughter for the very first time. The same daughter that was in the preschool class making my daughter feel welcome in our new church! I sat there and sobbed, very ugly sobs I'm afraid, watching God bring their family together & knew that we were there for a reason. Later that week the church had an informational meeting about adoption and had a panel of families from the church who had adopted in various ways; international from several countries, domestic newborn adoption & foster care through the state & private agencies. At the time we felt like the most likely path we would take would be domestic adoption. We thought it was unlikely that we could come up with funds to travel to another country multiple times and adopt internationally. Then we decided that we should maybe try an agency that was highly recommended in the area & is one of the largest in the U.S. We went to an orientation with them as well & for about a year just sat on it...praying, talking & waiting for direction. We knew we wanted to adopt, but weren't sure how it was going to happen.
Several months ago, a friend texted me out of the blue and asked if I had plans the next morning. She attends a MOPS (Mother's of preschoolers) meeting at a local church & they were having a guest speaker talk about adoption and she thought I may be interested. I went, not sure what it was going to be about. I sat there and listened to this sweet young woman talk about how she and her husband adopted two gorgeous children from Foster Care and how it has changed all their lives. Instantly I knew God had yet again placed me there for a reason. I contacted Nicole, and started reading her blog (which is awesome by the way...she's a WAY better blog Mommy than me & keeps hers updated multiple times daily!). From there, we began the process of Foster Care through DFCS. We attended an orientation in November & had to wait all the way until February to begin classes. The waiting has been a little tough I'll admit. We felt like we were on the right path & wanted to run down it to the finish line. I know God has an ultimate plan though, and we're trying to be patient! We finished 7 weeks of classes (20 hours) required by the state before you can become a foster home or foster to adopt, depending on which route you take. We also filled out a mountain of paperwork, questions, health screenings, fingerprints, anything you can imagine was required to be given to the state in addition to attending the classes.
We finished classes last week & now all we have left are 2 home visits by a case worker who will make sure our house is prepared (which we have a little work to do on that level, the "baby's room" is currently an office) and we are capable of adding another child to our lives.
We have decided we will be Foster parents for children ages 0-3, meaning any child in our age range can be placed in our home for any amount of time while their parent(s) work on a case plan to get their child(ren) back. This can be a quick or lengthy process, depending on the parent's willingness to comply.
We are hoping this will eventually lead to an adoption, but in the mean time we feel called to love the children whose parents can't love them at the moment for one reason or another. We want to be able to show them love and affection and care for them however long they need us & hopefully their parents will be able to do the same once they are returned. The class taught us that DFCS works with parents for up to a year on a case plan to get their lives straightened out & get their children back. If the parent can't get it together in a year, they assume they aren't making it a priority and the rights are terminated making the child officially adoptable. The foster parents the child lives with at the time have first choice to adopt, and if they don't want to, the case worker then looks for a foster to adopt family to give the child a forever home.
The question we are most asked when we discuss this is definitely "Don't you think it will be hard on your heart when they are taken away?" My answer to that is Of course I do! We know that when a child is placed in our home, no matter how much he or she rocks our world and tests our patience, that we will love them. It will be incredibly hard once we have a bond with them to send them back home not knowing if we'll ever see them again. Still, we feel like we are preparing ourselves for that possible heartache now and are doing what we're supposed to.
We know we will have some mentally, physically & emotionally trying days on this path...maybe a LOT of them, but we also know that God will not call us to do something he hasn't equipped us for.
We feel so blessed to be a part of a body of believers who are so active in adopting and have seen several miraculous adoptions with a few more in the works right now! On that first Sunday there, it was almost like we could feel God wrap his loving arms around us and say "It's ok, I have a plan. Trust in me, I've got this one covered, too!" Out of the suffering and sadness from my illness, treatments & surgeries that our family has experienced we trust that He is crafting a beautiful story that only HE can write!
There were so many steps along our path that could've easily not happened if one tiny thing or another was out of place. There are so many people who felt called to do something that was only a God thing: Invite us to that church, be a friend to our baby girl, have adoption sunday on that day, invite me to a mops meeting, speak about adoption...and on & on. I am so very thankful for you all & I'm so very excited to see where this journey leads!

If you made it through this LONG story, congratulations! I'm almost done...I ask that you please keep us in your prayers. Please pray that God is preparing us for this journey. All 3 of us are excited, but we also know there will be bumps along the way. We need prayer to prepare our hearts and minds so that when those storms come, we can stand like a mighty tree and weather them together. We also are praying that our home visits are scheduled soon. We are waiting on a case worker from our county, which is overrun with children in the foster care system, to contact us and schedule a home visit. Lastly, we ask that you pray for the Lord's will with regards to our forever family. We know He knows the future and we pray that He places the children in our home who are here for a purpose. Either for us, them, or both.
Thank you for your prayers, thoughts & encouragement! We can't wait to share more about this as developments happen! :-)